A Recipe To Try: A Good First Date
I like this because it includes specific instructions, starting with finding the right person:
Find somebody good on paper. Intelligent but really ‘hold your doors open’ nice. Kind of sarcastic but not that good at it as you are. Has a nice pair of glasses and plays Sudoku.
To dating prep:
Shower all the parts of your body you have, spraying the body spray on the neck and the breast things. Use lotion and shave your toes.
Go to bar. Arrive late. Awkward hug. Giggle. Order beer.
Don’t go home with them. Remember that you are a lady, a Winona Ryder in Little Women, and mostly remember that no relationships start on one night stands and you will snag this person! You will do all the right things with this person!
Read the whole thing here, trust me it's funny.